Ep. 42: When people don’t message back. Insecurity part 2

Insecurity is something that is very much impacted by the way we communicate today. When people don’t message you back or respond to you, it can be very easy to struggle with worry and insecurity as a result. In this episode, I discuss why this happens and offer some ideas that might help.

Our Brains:

Try to understand meaning therefore the status of the relationship

To Predict events


Not everyone is like you. Don’t use same rules to evaluate them

You have done it before, probably 

Some people don’t reach out

How much time do you waste thinking about why people don’t respond back?


Ignore you because Procrastination

Ignore you because Perfectionism

Ignore you because Exhausted 

Ignore you because Not in the Mood

Ignore you because ignoring everyone

Ignore you because afraid of rejection

Ignore you because Busy

Ignore you because scarcity and status (playing games)

Ignore you because embarrassed or afraid

Ignore you because they are arseholes

Ignore you because not a priority

Ignore you because make you feel bad

Ignore you because you annoy them

Don’t check messages and then too late to respond

Unconsciously ignore you


Follow up and Nice until they give you a clear understanding

Learn to let go of people that don’t prioritise you (flakiness, response, reach out)

Laugh at the idea of trying to make you feel bad

Feedback needed in terms of how you deal with it.

Don’t overthink it.